...Maybe It's Me...

Maybe it really is me
Look, I'm sorry for this paradox that allotts me the syntax to break your heart
But before you finally walk away can you just stop and allow me to explain the feelings that I endure and the origin of which they came
For example, the other day you said "I want this forever" and while your heart strings looped on romantic energies I simply was lost in the perception of you and I together
Its not that I don't love you, its just that I said I would never
Hold on to someone when I truly question if we can make it through any weather
Can you hold my hand during treacherous storms? Silence thunder with dilapidating words so cold winters won't do no harm?
And can you shape and form my summers so elegantly created by Stevie? Not leave me on poetic justice nights while helicopters search for souls no longer racial pleasing?
Please just give me 3 more mins of your time
I know that my words are beginning to hurt while you think im feeding you a line
But let me share what is really on my mind and how this is truly about me
I can't continue to let you sleep at night in the midst of a strangers company
Making love with no love in our eyes
Every time I walk out that door you don't think I know you cry?
You yourself have said it thousands of times that I am nothing without you
But baby, you are nothing with me
For centuries man was taught to love the essence of a woman beyond her Eptiome
But your jealous ways condone my envy of how someone who seems so strong can be hurt with me
Just a man standing on the passage of time seeking entry
I want to love till I run empty
Bleed so deep I can give life to plenty
Whisper secrets so gently that midnight wind takes a rest
You and I weren't meant to be, this was only a test
I tried to give you all of me, nothing more nothing less
But this feeling in my chest suggest that we we had time will some day forget
Please don't cry, this is not about you
You tried your best
This is about me being a man and trying not to hurt you like the last one who left
No pain, no stress
Tears stream fast, wiping away hurt you can no longer suppress
The feelings I possessed just laid on the surface, sat void on my soul but you never seemed to notice
Lost and out of focus, we continued to rekindle flames even though the embers were just smoke and
Confused emotions never spoken
You packed my shit and screamed "Leave" and that's when I knew you weren't joking
Turned knobs on restless doors end with hearts freshly broken
"Please don't leave" caught in your throat and
Now we are here again, but this time sanity was chosen
I'm sorry, I can't talk this out, I can't keep this going
Our past is a past that is golden, but our future is nothing but a notion
Please don't be angry, please don't continue to keep holding
On to that maybe it is you when honestly, truthfully it is me
I have imperfect flaws that your heart will always see
White lies on my tongue that your soul will never believe
You will continue to cry every time I step towards the door to leave
And you will always be at your worse as long as you are with me