Six
Warmth coated the insides of my throat as death resonated in my chest
Swallowed answers
Took deep breaths and waited
Silent
Anticipated immediate satisfaction as the insides of stomachs contracted
Cried tears as wombs convulsed and shook sense into me
This was not how the end was supposed to be but I chose it
Sweating
Waiting against the sides of tubs as eyes cloud over with regret
Fingers numb like tongues that wish to beg for help
I felt myself
Slipping
Between reality and sleeping
Cradled arms around nothing
Held on to the emptiness of your promise
That I would not be like the other girls
Pregnant
A statistic on paper
The one who allowed society to rape her
Impregnate her with this illegitimate excuse of his deceit
This was not how tomorrow was supposed to be
So I wait for today to end
Cold
Sheets of tiles remind me of the way he entered me without consent
Suppressed my limbs and forced kisses upon my skin
He took my innocence
Dared me to cry when I wanted to scream
Fingers wrapped around my neck as his body laid in between my hell and
Free
Hands
Shaking
Tears leaking as kicks suspend and cease to exist
Red anger drips sweat against me
Teeth clenched
Waiting for the end to get me
Six times he entered me
Without permission
Six times I asked for help but nobody would listen
Six pills will give me the hope prayers no longer mention
Swallowed
The answers nobody seem to have
This man is the epitome of justice
The yes when I was screaming no
The one who was let go because I didn’t take the time to get to know
Him
But why is he the victim when his crime lives within
Me
Barely…..breathing
Heartbeats…leaving
Bright lights receding as crimson pools aren’t a part of me
Dreaming
This isn’t how it was supposed to be
This wasn’t how it was supposed
To end
...My Apology...
Maybe this is regret
Remorse filled sorrow of the actions that took place and the words later shared
Maybe this is the breaking of hearts once realized you don’t care
Or the truth that always resided there
Inconsiderate of the love that is given until none remains
Or you treating me like the women who have already came
And gone
I want to imagine that you know how it feels to feel
Understand the struggle between self and what’s real
That not all people are able to deal with giving themselves to someone whole heartedly
Now every part of me wishes the past never was
Wishes that we hadn’t grown so close and apart in a matter of hours
Wishes I had more power over my senses
Wishing that I never mentioned the confessions on my heart
I’m not asking you to love me
I’m just asking you to give a fuck about my feelings
And as anger rises to the top of emotions I’d rather not deal with
I find myself suspended in between tears and despise
You aren’t the man I fell for
And maybe I should have allowed more time
Or opened my eyes and saw the realness that is you
But sometimes even lies hide behind the perception people give you
So this is me saying sorry to you
I’m sorry for falling
Sorry for giving you parts of me I’ve only shared with self
Sorry for waking up to think of you and no one else
Sorry for being available to you within a moments breath
Sorry for not walking away from you
Because now I know it would have been best
Remorse filled sorrow of the actions that took place and the words later shared
Maybe this is the breaking of hearts once realized you don’t care
Or the truth that always resided there
Inconsiderate of the love that is given until none remains
Or you treating me like the women who have already came
And gone
I want to imagine that you know how it feels to feel
Understand the struggle between self and what’s real
That not all people are able to deal with giving themselves to someone whole heartedly
Now every part of me wishes the past never was
Wishes that we hadn’t grown so close and apart in a matter of hours
Wishes I had more power over my senses
Wishing that I never mentioned the confessions on my heart
I’m not asking you to love me
I’m just asking you to give a fuck about my feelings
And as anger rises to the top of emotions I’d rather not deal with
I find myself suspended in between tears and despise
You aren’t the man I fell for
And maybe I should have allowed more time
Or opened my eyes and saw the realness that is you
But sometimes even lies hide behind the perception people give you
So this is me saying sorry to you
I’m sorry for falling
Sorry for giving you parts of me I’ve only shared with self
Sorry for waking up to think of you and no one else
Sorry for being available to you within a moments breath
Sorry for not walking away from you
Because now I know it would have been best
...Everything...
Looking at the bigger picture
Reviewing the smile behind its purpose
Laugh hues as we think of past memories repainted anew
Yet I forget the details
Over look your heart with selfishness newly defined
Erase the lines between space and time and no longer recognize the scars against the canvas
I refuse to see the pain
Relax the truth into the darkest corners of my mind and enjoy the delusion of infatuation
My consideration for you is none
The words you speak mean nothing
And the love you give will never be enough
So I paint with your tears and sketch with your thoughts
Remove the You that was never in Me and realize that this is me hurting you because I hurt
I want to feel something deeper than love for you
Something better than overstanding as you attempt to innerstand me
And I’ve become too demanding of you over self
Sometimes I just want to feel nothing at all
Walk away detached from my weaknesses
As hearts beat out of sequence and I find myself standing alone
Again
This time is the next time all over again
As beautiful as the first tear begin
We burned holes through words and said all we shouldn’t say
This isn’t love
This is two people fighting to be anything but alone
My misery is your company
And your pain is my shadow
This wasn’t but we made it be
Pressing against the delicate fabrics of time
We spend moments convincing each other of a love we no longer believe in
You deserve better than me
Better than the confusion between 4 walls of Hell
Fighting a battle we lost so long ago
Pretending selfishly that we still have chemistry
I’ve become your worst enemy
The reason for your prayers as you grab at the unseen
Crying softly as you refuse to leave
I’ve become everything you never wanted me to be
Reviewing the smile behind its purpose
Laugh hues as we think of past memories repainted anew
Yet I forget the details
Over look your heart with selfishness newly defined
Erase the lines between space and time and no longer recognize the scars against the canvas
I refuse to see the pain
Relax the truth into the darkest corners of my mind and enjoy the delusion of infatuation
My consideration for you is none
The words you speak mean nothing
And the love you give will never be enough
So I paint with your tears and sketch with your thoughts
Remove the You that was never in Me and realize that this is me hurting you because I hurt
I want to feel something deeper than love for you
Something better than overstanding as you attempt to innerstand me
And I’ve become too demanding of you over self
Sometimes I just want to feel nothing at all
Walk away detached from my weaknesses
As hearts beat out of sequence and I find myself standing alone
Again
This time is the next time all over again
As beautiful as the first tear begin
We burned holes through words and said all we shouldn’t say
This isn’t love
This is two people fighting to be anything but alone
My misery is your company
And your pain is my shadow
This wasn’t but we made it be
Pressing against the delicate fabrics of time
We spend moments convincing each other of a love we no longer believe in
You deserve better than me
Better than the confusion between 4 walls of Hell
Fighting a battle we lost so long ago
Pretending selfishly that we still have chemistry
I’ve become your worst enemy
The reason for your prayers as you grab at the unseen
Crying softly as you refuse to leave
I’ve become everything you never wanted me to be
...One...
Reaching for you on the empty side on my bed
Somehow forgetting that you are not there
But remembering the warmth of your lips against mine
The taste of late night confessions as words found their way to linked souls
I touched you against an orange moon
Lit stars ablaze as we switched between promises of now and thinking of tomorrow
Soft moans lingered in the emptiness of forever
And now the shadow of your kiss replays love songs against my memory
For the night we lost time in each others eyes
Lost ourselves in each others embrace
And sighed traces of worries against moonstruck skin
This is more than missing you
This is me clutching sheets for your touch
Replacing cold nights with the heat of your memory
Listening to the softness of your whisper against the wants of my heart
Tell me
When you sleep tonight will your dreams think of me?
Will your fingers reach for the sweetness of my touch?
Will you open your eyes and envision me in the darkness?
Will you miss me as much as I am missing you?
But see, this is more than missing you
This is me afraid to let go of yesterday because nothing is promised today
Sometimes we fall even when love isn’t ready to catch us
Controls us through our resistance to accept
And holds us as we pour feelings over heartbroken wounds
Truthfully
We are the greatest love story that will never be
The beauty of hope that I wish was more than a dream
You are everything to me
The softest spoken words that beat from my heart to my mind
The reality behind the illusion of time
And for the night you were mine
And I was yours
We were one
Somehow forgetting that you are not there
But remembering the warmth of your lips against mine
The taste of late night confessions as words found their way to linked souls
I touched you against an orange moon
Lit stars ablaze as we switched between promises of now and thinking of tomorrow
Soft moans lingered in the emptiness of forever
And now the shadow of your kiss replays love songs against my memory
For the night we lost time in each others eyes
Lost ourselves in each others embrace
And sighed traces of worries against moonstruck skin
This is more than missing you
This is me clutching sheets for your touch
Replacing cold nights with the heat of your memory
Listening to the softness of your whisper against the wants of my heart
Tell me
When you sleep tonight will your dreams think of me?
Will your fingers reach for the sweetness of my touch?
Will you open your eyes and envision me in the darkness?
Will you miss me as much as I am missing you?
But see, this is more than missing you
This is me afraid to let go of yesterday because nothing is promised today
Sometimes we fall even when love isn’t ready to catch us
Controls us through our resistance to accept
And holds us as we pour feelings over heartbroken wounds
Truthfully
We are the greatest love story that will never be
The beauty of hope that I wish was more than a dream
You are everything to me
The softest spoken words that beat from my heart to my mind
The reality behind the illusion of time
And for the night you were mine
And I was yours
We were one
...Calling Me...
I feel you calling me
Slow
Penetrating moans where bodies lose sleep
And your orgasm replays like my favorite song on repeat
I feel you calling me as I wrap legs around your body
And kisses run deep like heart beats
Fingers grab and miss hair
Lost words clutch on to skin soaked with Midnight’s air
I feel you calling me even when my body isn’t there
Remember how headboards caressed walls as time stopped and stared
Removed clothes with naked eyes as the sun began to rise
Deep grinds, backs arched and sighs
As hands run nature high
Closed minds, no asking why
One stroke, body begins to cry
Ascend the stairs only made for the Divine
Lost yourself in Heaven but there were no pearly gates
Just the place where my thighs divide and wait to meet your taste
Let your tongue become my savior that renewed my lost faith
Kisses to necks then pillows to face, you’re the extension to my end
Hands slap skin, move to shoulders then start all over again
Can’t help but start to beg you
You whispered “Even stop won’t save you”
I bet the neighbors know my name too
As we switched positions and your climax disobeyed you
Slow
Penetrating moans where bodies lose sleep
And your orgasm replays like my favorite song on repeat
I feel you calling me as I wrap legs around your body
And kisses run deep like heart beats
Fingers grab and miss hair
Lost words clutch on to skin soaked with Midnight’s air
I feel you calling me even when my body isn’t there
Remember how headboards caressed walls as time stopped and stared
Removed clothes with naked eyes as the sun began to rise
Deep grinds, backs arched and sighs
As hands run nature high
Closed minds, no asking why
One stroke, body begins to cry
Ascend the stairs only made for the Divine
Lost yourself in Heaven but there were no pearly gates
Just the place where my thighs divide and wait to meet your taste
Let your tongue become my savior that renewed my lost faith
Kisses to necks then pillows to face, you’re the extension to my end
Hands slap skin, move to shoulders then start all over again
Can’t help but start to beg you
You whispered “Even stop won’t save you”
I bet the neighbors know my name too
As we switched positions and your climax disobeyed you
...My Mother...
I give her the kind of love that dries tears
Offer sincere words that mend failures
And reassure her that we struggle together
To some she is just a mother
But to me she is a purpose
The pride in all I accomplish
The step behind my greatest journey
She is the smile in my soul and the power behind my being
She inspires me to dream beyond living
And gives love a new meaning
She is more than just a mother, she is the reason my heart is beating
The focus my life was needing
And I aspire to be everything she is
Even when my own fears take over
And the world couldn’t seem colder
She lovingly offers a shoulder and I become her baby again
She is more than a bestfriend
She’s a new beginning every time a day starts to end
And I need her more than she could ever need me
2 years after a stroke with slow recovery
She shows me that there are no limits on possibilities
And that tears are useless and go against productivity
So I dry my aching heart and love her again unconditionally
See, to you she’s a woman whose becoming elderly
But to me she’s a timeless beauty heaven sent to me
And everyday I strive harder to be the daughter I was born to be
Offer sincere words that mend failures
And reassure her that we struggle together
To some she is just a mother
But to me she is a purpose
The pride in all I accomplish
The step behind my greatest journey
She is the smile in my soul and the power behind my being
She inspires me to dream beyond living
And gives love a new meaning
She is more than just a mother, she is the reason my heart is beating
The focus my life was needing
And I aspire to be everything she is
Even when my own fears take over
And the world couldn’t seem colder
She lovingly offers a shoulder and I become her baby again
She is more than a bestfriend
She’s a new beginning every time a day starts to end
And I need her more than she could ever need me
2 years after a stroke with slow recovery
She shows me that there are no limits on possibilities
And that tears are useless and go against productivity
So I dry my aching heart and love her again unconditionally
See, to you she’s a woman whose becoming elderly
But to me she’s a timeless beauty heaven sent to me
And everyday I strive harder to be the daughter I was born to be
...Finding My Way...
Lost but not found
4 years that feel like centuries ago I walked away from life and into what has now become my shadow
Premature understanding like birth from wombs that house children who haven’t matured
I walked away from yesterday into the unknown that felt like home
Ran away on a stream of tears into the wilderness in search of me
Because the women on TV never looked quite like me
Nor did the woman in the mirror after I removed remnants of lost dreams
And if silence can help me define these random thoughts that scared away sleep
Maybe looking soul deep could some how define me
So I ran
Heart and mind wide open like the possibilities
No limits enslaved me because this time I ran away free
Free from yesterday and the days before
Free from the ones who only saw me as a lost black girl
Free from beliefs that never made sense to me
Free from me standing in the way of who I was meant to be
4 years that feel like centuries ago I walked away from life and into what has now become my shadow
Premature understanding like birth from wombs that house children who haven’t matured
I walked away from yesterday into the unknown that felt like home
Ran away on a stream of tears into the wilderness in search of me
Because the women on TV never looked quite like me
Nor did the woman in the mirror after I removed remnants of lost dreams
And if silence can help me define these random thoughts that scared away sleep
Maybe looking soul deep could some how define me
So I ran
Heart and mind wide open like the possibilities
No limits enslaved me because this time I ran away free
Free from yesterday and the days before
Free from the ones who only saw me as a lost black girl
Free from beliefs that never made sense to me
Free from me standing in the way of who I was meant to be
...Day Rise...
I remember when I shared you with the sun
Connected over lines as we weaved thoughts like night clouds & stars
Counted moments that we painted with memories of now
I experienced your mind before your body
Appreciated the thoughts before the man
And wondered of the joy behind the way you kissed words with the baritone of your breath
You caressed my mind till day rise put night fall to rest
And we shared space and mind while words lingered against missed sleep
You are the light mornings run to
The dream only skies can dream of
And I see you for all that you are and will forever be
A beckon of light implanted in my memory
Now I count minutes till its just you and me
And the sun
Connected over lines as we weaved thoughts like night clouds & stars
Counted moments that we painted with memories of now
I experienced your mind before your body
Appreciated the thoughts before the man
And wondered of the joy behind the way you kissed words with the baritone of your breath
You caressed my mind till day rise put night fall to rest
And we shared space and mind while words lingered against missed sleep
You are the light mornings run to
The dream only skies can dream of
And I see you for all that you are and will forever be
A beckon of light implanted in my memory
Now I count minutes till its just you and me
And the sun
...Rewrite...
I’m rewriting the world
Tracing back steps of lost and forgotten days
Illuminating my DNA and counting chromosomes
Realizing that I am Queen before I was his Bitch
The moon that highlights the sun
The harmony between Gods and Earths
I am Life to the words that died behind pens
The moment that suspended into eternity
Feeding off my energy
I am the womb of creativity
I give birth to art and call it poetry
Write tears on paper and call it fiction
Listen to your fears and make them my mistakes
I transcend for all women, vibrate in positive space
I am the air in lungs
The voice behind chords that scream
Better than a smokers addiction to nicotine
I am your dream’s favorite dream
I rewrite the world within me and label it “Serene”
Break the shackles for HueManity and let their minds roam free
I am the thought to the thinker
The validity of your illusion
Comparable to the greatest stories
A never ending conclusion
I am the confusion between right and wrong
The heartbeat to your favorite song
The answers, the questions
Your intuition
Your perception
The subjugated deception of the outer world’s reflection
The pulse after resurrection
The assured and aware
The knowledge that feeds the ignorant with care
I am
The world
Or so I have it in me
Write memories to my mental
Redefining society
Tracing back steps of lost and forgotten days
Illuminating my DNA and counting chromosomes
Realizing that I am Queen before I was his Bitch
The moon that highlights the sun
The harmony between Gods and Earths
I am Life to the words that died behind pens
The moment that suspended into eternity
Feeding off my energy
I am the womb of creativity
I give birth to art and call it poetry
Write tears on paper and call it fiction
Listen to your fears and make them my mistakes
I transcend for all women, vibrate in positive space
I am the air in lungs
The voice behind chords that scream
Better than a smokers addiction to nicotine
I am your dream’s favorite dream
I rewrite the world within me and label it “Serene”
Break the shackles for HueManity and let their minds roam free
I am the thought to the thinker
The validity of your illusion
Comparable to the greatest stories
A never ending conclusion
I am the confusion between right and wrong
The heartbeat to your favorite song
The answers, the questions
Your intuition
Your perception
The subjugated deception of the outer world’s reflection
The pulse after resurrection
The assured and aware
The knowledge that feeds the ignorant with care
I am
The world
Or so I have it in me
Write memories to my mental
Redefining society
...Love Me...
You were sent to me
Not wrapped in pretty bows or with bells and whistles
No signs that block lettered my name and labeled you mine
You just appeared like a figment of my imagination
And I wanted you
Wanted you so deep that my veins bleed you and my heart beat only to the syllables of your name
Bared my soul the first night you came and our bodies connected as one
From moon to sun and over again
We kissed blessings to the wind and thank God for the orgasms that took over
As toes curled like hair between your fingers
You penetrated me with worries that this is all we would be
Licked me from my ears to the back of my knees
Between my thighs as your tongue found my beat and we shared blue spots over black nights because cumming has never felt like this
And I have never kissed like this
My body has never bent like this
Your deep strokes where rhythm never missed
You spelled “Us” but it never included I
And I closed my eyes like I didn’t know this would be our first and last time
And you
You kissed my wants good bye like condoms
Dressed and left my heart in a state of hunger
This was all that I never wanted
All that I never asked for
But I always asked for you
Not in pretty bows or with bells and whistles
No block letters that spelled my name
Just that this time you came
To love me.
Not wrapped in pretty bows or with bells and whistles
No signs that block lettered my name and labeled you mine
You just appeared like a figment of my imagination
And I wanted you
Wanted you so deep that my veins bleed you and my heart beat only to the syllables of your name
Bared my soul the first night you came and our bodies connected as one
From moon to sun and over again
We kissed blessings to the wind and thank God for the orgasms that took over
As toes curled like hair between your fingers
You penetrated me with worries that this is all we would be
Licked me from my ears to the back of my knees
Between my thighs as your tongue found my beat and we shared blue spots over black nights because cumming has never felt like this
And I have never kissed like this
My body has never bent like this
Your deep strokes where rhythm never missed
You spelled “Us” but it never included I
And I closed my eyes like I didn’t know this would be our first and last time
And you
You kissed my wants good bye like condoms
Dressed and left my heart in a state of hunger
This was all that I never wanted
All that I never asked for
But I always asked for you
Not in pretty bows or with bells and whistles
No block letters that spelled my name
Just that this time you came
To love me.
...Forever...
Give me the night
And I will give you the forever that rest on moonlights that shine against the life of your eyes
You move me
Like swoons that faint against perpetuated heartbeats that wait
I dream contently of the day your love will be my only and one
As we count stars that run into the sun
I touch you
Slowly and assured that this time and space we share is by fate
You are my soul mate with whom my heart is wide open
I dreamt of you before our words were secretly chosen
Destiny has spoken and you are the love I always prayed for
To touch your hand brings tears to my soul
For I never thought that I would get a chance to hold you
Taste your name against my tongues caress
I would walk this Earth alone till death if it meant I could have you after I take my last breath
I could never leave you even if heartache resided in my chest
I will love you long after time fails this test
Apprehensive fears lay to rest as I confess that I more than over love you with want
I need you like daylight needs the sun
And if this means our beginning has just begun
I wish for happily ever after and hope the ending never comes.
And I will give you the forever that rest on moonlights that shine against the life of your eyes
You move me
Like swoons that faint against perpetuated heartbeats that wait
I dream contently of the day your love will be my only and one
As we count stars that run into the sun
I touch you
Slowly and assured that this time and space we share is by fate
You are my soul mate with whom my heart is wide open
I dreamt of you before our words were secretly chosen
Destiny has spoken and you are the love I always prayed for
To touch your hand brings tears to my soul
For I never thought that I would get a chance to hold you
Taste your name against my tongues caress
I would walk this Earth alone till death if it meant I could have you after I take my last breath
I could never leave you even if heartache resided in my chest
I will love you long after time fails this test
Apprehensive fears lay to rest as I confess that I more than over love you with want
I need you like daylight needs the sun
And if this means our beginning has just begun
I wish for happily ever after and hope the ending never comes.
...Don't Want To Love You...
I don’t want to love you
Rather not care about the way that you feel or how your heart moves
Don’t want to remember the space between your words and breath
Visualize the way you look at me as if I am greatest part of you
Or reminisce about the way we connected, chemistry blinding my view
I don’t want to feel
Don’t want to find day dreams waiting for me as if exhaling these mental imageries that some how project you and me in a kiss that leaves me weak in the knees
I don’t want to close my eyes and continue to see you in between my heart and soul beating
Testing me to forget love is like the first time all over again
Forget that maybe this time you aren’t like all the lost men
And that maybe this time love stories won’t end
Or that maybe its fear
Maybe I’m scared
Scared to love someone on the same level that I love myself
Scared to run into your heart when the world leaves me with no one else
Scared to be vulnerable
Scared to be attached
Scared to say the things my heart can never retract
Like how I love you
Love you so simple
Love you like the 3 tears that fall down my cheek because I have never loved like this
Love you wholly
Love you complete
Love you after my heart loses it last beat
I just want to love you
Love you with all of me
But I’ll never be her
So I rather not love you
Love you in ways your heart beats for her
Love you like the days that rise with her in mind
Don’t want to love you when I know you’ll reject me every time
Don’t want to love you when you and she are meant to be
Don’t want to love you when I know you’ll never love me
Rather not care about the way that you feel or how your heart moves
Don’t want to remember the space between your words and breath
Visualize the way you look at me as if I am greatest part of you
Or reminisce about the way we connected, chemistry blinding my view
I don’t want to feel
Don’t want to find day dreams waiting for me as if exhaling these mental imageries that some how project you and me in a kiss that leaves me weak in the knees
I don’t want to close my eyes and continue to see you in between my heart and soul beating
Testing me to forget love is like the first time all over again
Forget that maybe this time you aren’t like all the lost men
And that maybe this time love stories won’t end
Or that maybe its fear
Maybe I’m scared
Scared to love someone on the same level that I love myself
Scared to run into your heart when the world leaves me with no one else
Scared to be vulnerable
Scared to be attached
Scared to say the things my heart can never retract
Like how I love you
Love you so simple
Love you like the 3 tears that fall down my cheek because I have never loved like this
Love you wholly
Love you complete
Love you after my heart loses it last beat
I just want to love you
Love you with all of me
But I’ll never be her
So I rather not love you
Love you in ways your heart beats for her
Love you like the days that rise with her in mind
Don’t want to love you when I know you’ll reject me every time
Don’t want to love you when you and she are meant to be
Don’t want to love you when I know you’ll never love me
...Cum For Me...
Imagination passed voyeuristic turnstiles
As I watched you, watching me, enjoying you, inside of me
Deep
Long
Slow strokes that leave moans caught in my throat
I’m tingling
As your fingers trace my breast
Nipples beg for your tongue’s caress
Dream colored thighs more than slippery when wet
Fingers tensed in my hair, whispering moans against my neck
As you move deeper
Closer
Let our rhythm do the rest
Arch my back and roll my hips, say your name without request
In and out
Pressing harder
Skin flushed
Dripping sweat
Grabbing sheets in between you removing the nature of our sex
No more teasing
Looked into my eyes as your hands started easing
Between my legs than around my thighs
Kissed my clit so passionately that orgasms started to cry
Hands grip your face, legs trembling, tears fall from my eyes
Skin flushed from steady cumming, gently turns me on my side
Enters slowly
Bites my shoulder
Face in pillow
Now I’m completely bent over
Clutching skin
Moves deeper in
G-spot humming
Can’t tell where he ends or I begin
As I watched you, watching me, enjoying you, inside of me
Deep
Long
Slow strokes that leave moans caught in my throat
I’m tingling
As your fingers trace my breast
Nipples beg for your tongue’s caress
Dream colored thighs more than slippery when wet
Fingers tensed in my hair, whispering moans against my neck
As you move deeper
Closer
Let our rhythm do the rest
Arch my back and roll my hips, say your name without request
In and out
Pressing harder
Skin flushed
Dripping sweat
Grabbing sheets in between you removing the nature of our sex
No more teasing
Looked into my eyes as your hands started easing
Between my legs than around my thighs
Kissed my clit so passionately that orgasms started to cry
Hands grip your face, legs trembling, tears fall from my eyes
Skin flushed from steady cumming, gently turns me on my side
Enters slowly
Bites my shoulder
Face in pillow
Now I’m completely bent over
Clutching skin
Moves deeper in
G-spot humming
Can’t tell where he ends or I begin
...So High...
He pulls at my subconscious
Gives me dreams in colors only God could create
And I allow him to have me
Breathe him into lungs over waiting of the pure adulteration of his sex
He feeds me with emotions that leave my eyes bloodshot heartbreak red
Concealed behind pain that stabs mental wounds like convictions as thoughts bleed into my brain
He is the only one who will listen to my fears
And there he has me
Inside of dark filled nights where sunlight never showed its face
We shared secrets like needles that wipe out the human race
And I breathe him
Into lungs excused from the awakening of self beneath red colored eyes with the iris of deception
He is my connection to feeling because I’m tried of wanting
And if u pierce me I will test positive for giving a fuck long after love gave up
I am the injured in need of a quick fix
And if the lies that hide behind smoke hue highs will allow me to forget forgiving
I’ll take another toke and wish prayers up to my Lord for healing
My problem isn’t dealing with reality painted feelings
But the after affects once the sentiments retract and I’m the one left vulnerable and willing
So he gives me a high better than sun light skies and I give him
I give him
I give him the nothingness that sits inside my soul since the day you told me it was over
That’s when I lick my lips, make my hips dip and let him take over
When your insides are dark your heart will beat colder
Penetrate that dark space; no longer see your face as I look over my shoulder
Because rejection is staring at me
I allowed feelings to have me
Emotions burned deep before consciousness could grab me
Gives me dreams in colors only God could create
And I allow him to have me
Breathe him into lungs over waiting of the pure adulteration of his sex
He feeds me with emotions that leave my eyes bloodshot heartbreak red
Concealed behind pain that stabs mental wounds like convictions as thoughts bleed into my brain
He is the only one who will listen to my fears
And there he has me
Inside of dark filled nights where sunlight never showed its face
We shared secrets like needles that wipe out the human race
And I breathe him
Into lungs excused from the awakening of self beneath red colored eyes with the iris of deception
He is my connection to feeling because I’m tried of wanting
And if u pierce me I will test positive for giving a fuck long after love gave up
I am the injured in need of a quick fix
And if the lies that hide behind smoke hue highs will allow me to forget forgiving
I’ll take another toke and wish prayers up to my Lord for healing
My problem isn’t dealing with reality painted feelings
But the after affects once the sentiments retract and I’m the one left vulnerable and willing
So he gives me a high better than sun light skies and I give him
I give him
I give him the nothingness that sits inside my soul since the day you told me it was over
That’s when I lick my lips, make my hips dip and let him take over
When your insides are dark your heart will beat colder
Penetrate that dark space; no longer see your face as I look over my shoulder
Because rejection is staring at me
I allowed feelings to have me
Emotions burned deep before consciousness could grab me
...Listening...
I found him sleeping behind open eyes
Dazed
Confused by reality cold enough to freeze winters
He speaks whispers to his long forgotten faith
Pain seems to know his name
Claimed his soul as he reached for love behind closed doors
He lives in the past so forever won’t change
Lived in the moment till their ending came
And I
I offer a shoulder that wipes tears with open ears for the weeping
Overstand the situation when I can’t even comprehend the broken heart of men
He cries
Allowing me to nourish egos with sentiments he can no longer feel
Me saying “Your heart will heal” means nothing
Doesn’t replace her walking out of closed heart doors as he begged her to say something
So I get silent
Listen to him pray as he cries tears of shame to a God he tries not to blame
To say I feel his pain would be a cliché
So I listen
Rambled words where sense doesn’t matter
He compares sorrows to death as heartbeats race in his chest
His only request is to not feel
Not deal with love slipping through fingers when he thought this time was real
And I still say nothing
Rather listen with open ears than my optimistic heart that says “This will get better”
And whether or not I helped him put his pieces back together is still a mystery
That night angels sent him to me and I temporarily stopped the pain
By listening
Dazed
Confused by reality cold enough to freeze winters
He speaks whispers to his long forgotten faith
Pain seems to know his name
Claimed his soul as he reached for love behind closed doors
He lives in the past so forever won’t change
Lived in the moment till their ending came
And I
I offer a shoulder that wipes tears with open ears for the weeping
Overstand the situation when I can’t even comprehend the broken heart of men
He cries
Allowing me to nourish egos with sentiments he can no longer feel
Me saying “Your heart will heal” means nothing
Doesn’t replace her walking out of closed heart doors as he begged her to say something
So I get silent
Listen to him pray as he cries tears of shame to a God he tries not to blame
To say I feel his pain would be a cliché
So I listen
Rambled words where sense doesn’t matter
He compares sorrows to death as heartbeats race in his chest
His only request is to not feel
Not deal with love slipping through fingers when he thought this time was real
And I still say nothing
Rather listen with open ears than my optimistic heart that says “This will get better”
And whether or not I helped him put his pieces back together is still a mystery
That night angels sent him to me and I temporarily stopped the pain
By listening
...U, Me & A Pen...
This is not a poem
This is me fixated by the content of your body
So entangled I neglect previous lovers as I dwell on the swell of your bottom lip
Taste your meaning under dim lit lights
Drink of your intoxicating red wine thought process that leaves me mentally tingling
Throbbing for clarity as we move beyond sheets to scribes of your dictation
Your words lay before me
Naked
Pleading for the sanity of my tongue against the sway of your frame like finger to pen
We connected nouns and adjectives as sweat grazed our skin
Like heat to flame
Built up infernos as letters whispered my name
Pulsations punctuate when the rise and fall came
Pen stroked harder
You erected words that we dare not speak
As ink penetrate meanings like g-spots soul deep
Hmmm…just like honey
Feeds you the nourishment you seek
Grip notebooks like hair; sugar cane mouth hums you to peak
This is me fixated by the content of your body
So entangled I neglect previous lovers as I dwell on the swell of your bottom lip
Taste your meaning under dim lit lights
Drink of your intoxicating red wine thought process that leaves me mentally tingling
Throbbing for clarity as we move beyond sheets to scribes of your dictation
Your words lay before me
Naked
Pleading for the sanity of my tongue against the sway of your frame like finger to pen
We connected nouns and adjectives as sweat grazed our skin
Like heat to flame
Built up infernos as letters whispered my name
Pulsations punctuate when the rise and fall came
Pen stroked harder
You erected words that we dare not speak
As ink penetrate meanings like g-spots soul deep
Hmmm…just like honey
Feeds you the nourishment you seek
Grip notebooks like hair; sugar cane mouth hums you to peak
...A Simple Poem...
I wanted to write this because sometimes I can be a little too complex
Run off on tangents
Metaphorically compare you to planets
And galaxies
With stars
Like milky ways
And you’re supposed to know I’m talking about your finger tips
Do you catch my drift?
I can get a little….deep when words and art meet
So I figured it be best if I simply speak the things that rest on my mind
One line at a time
So, here it goes…
I think your dope
Fly, funky and fresh all wrapped into one
And if there was another word under the sun to describe you, I would use that one too
Like, call you “YourSoBeautiful” without spaces
Then erase it
Write it again in upper and lower cases
You know like “YoUrSoBeAuTiful” and hope it place a smile on your face and
Somehow stimulate your heart to skip a beat or two for me
Infatuation has consumed me
Got me day dreaming about you at work as if that’s what I’m paid to do
Losing my thoughts in meetings, got my coworkers asking about you
Like “Hey, who is this dude?”
“No for real, who is he?”
So I tell little white lies and pray that God forgives me
Something nonchalant like “No one special. Really”
When we all know
It gets
No ‘specialer’
Than you
I dig you
Not caring if you even dig me back
Not going to retract statements if friendship is all we have and you leave it at that
Not going to try to persuade you by stating heart felt facts
Like….
Your words move me before any emotion could
And if you would give me the chance
I will love you forever
Never wasting a second to appreciate you, ever
And you make my stomach flutter more than butterflies do
In so deep that when I touch you
It feels like my very first time falling
All over again
But since you want to be friends I have to respect that
Seal this simple poem with a kiss
And take a step back
Run off on tangents
Metaphorically compare you to planets
And galaxies
With stars
Like milky ways
And you’re supposed to know I’m talking about your finger tips
Do you catch my drift?
I can get a little….deep when words and art meet
So I figured it be best if I simply speak the things that rest on my mind
One line at a time
So, here it goes…
I think your dope
Fly, funky and fresh all wrapped into one
And if there was another word under the sun to describe you, I would use that one too
Like, call you “YourSoBeautiful” without spaces
Then erase it
Write it again in upper and lower cases
You know like “YoUrSoBeAuTiful” and hope it place a smile on your face and
Somehow stimulate your heart to skip a beat or two for me
Infatuation has consumed me
Got me day dreaming about you at work as if that’s what I’m paid to do
Losing my thoughts in meetings, got my coworkers asking about you
Like “Hey, who is this dude?”
“No for real, who is he?”
So I tell little white lies and pray that God forgives me
Something nonchalant like “No one special. Really”
When we all know
It gets
No ‘specialer’
Than you
I dig you
Not caring if you even dig me back
Not going to retract statements if friendship is all we have and you leave it at that
Not going to try to persuade you by stating heart felt facts
Like….
Your words move me before any emotion could
And if you would give me the chance
I will love you forever
Never wasting a second to appreciate you, ever
And you make my stomach flutter more than butterflies do
In so deep that when I touch you
It feels like my very first time falling
All over again
But since you want to be friends I have to respect that
Seal this simple poem with a kiss
And take a step back
...My Favorite Poet...
He speaks to me in poems
Connecting on stanzas of love as his words seep slow like time
He is my favorite prose
The unexplainable as we link words like kisses on love forgiven skin
We are two broken hearts shattered like shotgun feelings to open mind windows
Held together by the faith that love and poetry still coexist
We speak volumes in silence as pens mate with paper
Make words tremble and climax like scratches on back to sheets that bleed metaphors of the thinkable
Derive from vocabic solitude that he is the half to my whole and I am his complete
His inspiration is the color of my soul
The seemingly endless hues of emotion filled hearts that rain love like tears
This feeling is in every color like auras that radiate suns and moons
He is my muse
The courage behind lack of love words tattooed on bared sleeves because this time will be different
He is my favorite poet
Connecting on stanzas of love as his words seep slow like time
He is my favorite prose
The unexplainable as we link words like kisses on love forgiven skin
We are two broken hearts shattered like shotgun feelings to open mind windows
Held together by the faith that love and poetry still coexist
We speak volumes in silence as pens mate with paper
Make words tremble and climax like scratches on back to sheets that bleed metaphors of the thinkable
Derive from vocabic solitude that he is the half to my whole and I am his complete
His inspiration is the color of my soul
The seemingly endless hues of emotion filled hearts that rain love like tears
This feeling is in every color like auras that radiate suns and moons
He is my muse
The courage behind lack of love words tattooed on bared sleeves because this time will be different
He is my favorite poet
...Last Night...
Last night I kissed you while you dreamed
Hoped to intrude with the sweet taste of my heart so you could remember me at dawn
I kissed you a thousand times and whispered thoughts that lay complacent on my mind
In that space and time you were solely mine and we shared moments
I stopped breathing just so we could breathe as one
And gave you my heart every time your beat took a rest
Last night I laid my head on your chest just so I could hear your soul and I lost myself in you
Eyes closed still could not dim your perfection
As lids flutter, slightly open, your eyes are Love’s reflection
In nocturnal states, bodies mend without sexual connections
Erect in dream, mental orgasms subconscious affection
As you hold me closer and kiss me on my neck and
Hand strums the spine of back as you speak my name’s confession
“Baby….I love you”
Last night I kissed you while you dreamed
Hoped to intrude with the sweet taste of my heart so you could remember me at dawn
I whispered love a thousand times and waited for the moment I could look you in your eyes
And say “I love you too”
Hoped to intrude with the sweet taste of my heart so you could remember me at dawn
I kissed you a thousand times and whispered thoughts that lay complacent on my mind
In that space and time you were solely mine and we shared moments
I stopped breathing just so we could breathe as one
And gave you my heart every time your beat took a rest
Last night I laid my head on your chest just so I could hear your soul and I lost myself in you
Eyes closed still could not dim your perfection
As lids flutter, slightly open, your eyes are Love’s reflection
In nocturnal states, bodies mend without sexual connections
Erect in dream, mental orgasms subconscious affection
As you hold me closer and kiss me on my neck and
Hand strums the spine of back as you speak my name’s confession
“Baby….I love you”
Last night I kissed you while you dreamed
Hoped to intrude with the sweet taste of my heart so you could remember me at dawn
I whispered love a thousand times and waited for the moment I could look you in your eyes
And say “I love you too”
...Dial Tone...
You pick up telephone lines dead to forgiving souls as you seek retribution from the free.
I don’t understand you
Allow the dial tone to convey my inner thoughts
Adequately process proclamations that your injustice is rightfully just as you beat Queens like pen to paper for baring a thought.
Concluding with a validating back of the hand for speaking when not spoken to
She worshipped you even when scared to
Allow me my fallen King to understand the unjust in your feeble attempts to reclaim your manhood by hitting her?
Speak to me in volumes
Dwell on the major and minute not sparing a detail
Revisit the beginning transcended to the climatic end of you stored in cell blocks similar to zoo cages for acting an ass
Feed me lies of how 5’3” next to your 6’1” frame ended with you feeling intimidated
Explain how questions lead to a blood stained mouth and locked bathroom door
Fill me with your anger, your miseducation
Your defeat so that this bullshit you spit to me over phone tapped lines can all make sense
You Sir are a coward
No longer worthy of a name
Adorn a scarlet letter like wife beater to your chest as you are one and the same
Tell me; was it easy beating her just to profess you will change?
Process this thought, my non verbal exchange
Dial Tone
Please don’t call here again
I don’t understand you
Allow the dial tone to convey my inner thoughts
Adequately process proclamations that your injustice is rightfully just as you beat Queens like pen to paper for baring a thought.
Concluding with a validating back of the hand for speaking when not spoken to
She worshipped you even when scared to
Allow me my fallen King to understand the unjust in your feeble attempts to reclaim your manhood by hitting her?
Speak to me in volumes
Dwell on the major and minute not sparing a detail
Revisit the beginning transcended to the climatic end of you stored in cell blocks similar to zoo cages for acting an ass
Feed me lies of how 5’3” next to your 6’1” frame ended with you feeling intimidated
Explain how questions lead to a blood stained mouth and locked bathroom door
Fill me with your anger, your miseducation
Your defeat so that this bullshit you spit to me over phone tapped lines can all make sense
You Sir are a coward
No longer worthy of a name
Adorn a scarlet letter like wife beater to your chest as you are one and the same
Tell me; was it easy beating her just to profess you will change?
Process this thought, my non verbal exchange
Dial Tone
Please don’t call here again
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